Community, Friendship

How To Feed Your Soul

November 13, 2013

You can be so busy you forget to feed your soul.

I called her late in the afternoon, without much warning, and even less to offer. There’d be no quiet space out amid the hum of a restaurant or coffee shop. Just the shooshing of my dishwasher and the sight of my kitchen sink piled with the days dishes.

The kids might or might not get to bed on time, and so there’d be a few necessary trecks up and down the stairs mid-sentence, for another tucking in, a reminder that it is in fact, bed time.

I built a fire.

I baked a desert.


I came to the table tired and a bit messy at the corners–my home in less than stellar condition for presentation.

But when you’re among friends, these things don’t matter as much as you think they do.

I cleaned dishes while we chatted. We hopped from topic to topic, distracted by our own tangents, To anyone else, our conversation might have seemed a bit schizophrenic.

But not to me. I feasted on all of it.

It was just us. Two women, connecting at the end of a day, on the eve of a new week, after too much time apart.

Chocolate-Walnut Torte

The walnut torte came out better than expected–baking a first-time recipe at the literal moment of her arrival could have been seen as foolishness.

Failing didn’t concern me because friends are the ones you can fail in front of. They are the ones who laugh with you when the torts collapses, or the toilet clogs. These are the safe people–the ones who’ve earned an inside seat to the table of our hearts–and our messy kitchens.


We painted our nails and ate seconds of desert. We shared concerns and joys, struggles of the moment made lighter through the communion of two friends, held fast by Jesus.

We watched the fire shrink, but our cups never ran dry.

Sitting with her I was reminded of the need for community–the flesh and blood kind, the sit-on-my- couch-next-to-my-laundry-piles, kind.

empty pie plate


Sometimes, we don’t know how hungry we are until we come the the table. 

“The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, not the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when you discover that someone else believes in you and is willing to trust you with a friendship.”  Ralph Waldo Emerson


Sharing this post in community with Jennifer and Emily.


PS: That delicious looking torte I made? It’s gluten free. Oh yes, and SO yummy. Click here for the recipe.


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  • Reply kelli woodford November 13, 2013 at 3:03 am

    Ah … perhaps THIS, then, is what I have been so famished for … Thank you, Kris. You whet my appetite in all the best ways.

    • Reply Kris Camealy November 13, 2013 at 5:41 pm

      Thank you, Kelli. I hope you can manage a good visit with a nearby friend soon. We need it, don’t we? So much more than we realize.

  • Reply Shelly Miller November 13, 2013 at 3:36 am

    Oh, how I miss this kind of friendship in my hometown. Beautiful Kris, all of it.

    • Reply Kris Camealy November 13, 2013 at 5:42 pm

      I am sorry to know that you don’t have much of this where you are–praying for you, Shelly. God is moving…

  • Reply Christine- Fruit in Season November 13, 2013 at 4:07 am

    I love this, Kris. My kitchen friend. Miss you. <3

  • Reply Ashlie November 13, 2013 at 12:54 pm

    Beautiful. Brought tears to my eyes. I’m so bad about failing to recognize hunger pains until it’s to a desperation point. Needed this reminder today.

    • Reply Kris Camealy November 13, 2013 at 5:43 pm

      Me too, Ashlie. I figure when I get all weepy and lonely, it’s because I’m well past starving. Why I wait that long, I don’t know… LOVE YOU, can’t wait to sit at your table at Refine.

  • Reply Lyli Dunbar November 13, 2013 at 1:13 pm

    That looks yummy! Girl time is the best time, isn’t it? 🙂

  • Reply JViola79 November 13, 2013 at 2:35 pm

    Beautiful! Oh how we each need a friendship like this!

  • Reply rachel lee November 13, 2013 at 3:48 pm

    this is gorgeous. this is stunning. made something shiver in me. i miss this.

    • Reply Kris Camealy November 13, 2013 at 5:44 pm

      Rachel, thank you for reading and encouraging. Praying you are filled with the delight and blessing of a kindred friend.

  • Reply Jerri Miller November 13, 2013 at 4:59 pm

    Lovely post on friendship! I loved your line: ” friends are the ones you can fail in front of.”

    So true … and may I be such a friend that my kindred spirits are not afraid to fail in front of me.

  • Reply Amy Hunt November 13, 2013 at 6:46 pm

    Oh, yes! This. Communion . . . like what we bring when we visit together. No judgment, no shame, no fear of messy . . . just us . . . just worship.

  • Reply Paula Gamble November 13, 2013 at 7:03 pm

    I love this post, Kris! And though we’ve never met, we’d be sweet friends. I love the sit next to my laundry piles, eat my experimental food, and have our schitzophrenic conversation that just makes sense – and it all feeds our soul like nothing else can. I so am with ya!

  • Reply Mia November 14, 2013 at 10:26 am

    Dear Kris
    Oh, we so often sit at the table of our God starving and for some reason feeling unworthy to feast on the Bread of Life and the Wine of His blood and that is exactly what He has prepared for us! When we truly realize that it is totally, completely and extravagantly free, we can eat and drink and never go spiritual hungry again!
    Blessings XX

  • Reply Julie Reynolds November 14, 2013 at 3:48 pm

    aah…this post made me all weepy yesterday. Wishing we lived closer, you are one of the few friends I feel like I can fall down and get back up in front of with no judgement just helping hands to help me up. Thank you friend for always using your words in such a beautiful authentic way.

  • Reply Emily Wierenga November 15, 2013 at 5:54 am

    “sometimes we don’t know how hungry we are until we come to the table.” LOVE this kris. and that dessert looks divine…

  • Reply Margo November 17, 2013 at 11:29 pm

    I love this: “Failing didn’t concern me because friends are the ones you can fail in front of.They are the ones who laugh with you when the torts collapses, or the toilet clogs. These are the safe people–the ones who’ve earned an inside seat to the table of our hearts–and our messy kitchens.” Wonderful!
    Margo @ Legacy of a Single Girl

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