Children, Grace, Love

If I have Not Love


If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,t but do not have love, I gain nothing. 1 Corinthians 13:1-5

I make a lot of noise in this space, my constant jostling through our days, knocking around, spilling out things other than love. My flaws burn too obvious and in an effort to cover them up, to hide my stains I bang on obnoxiously, a resounding gong, crashing cymbals.  

I am  trying to love, to learn to live it well, to learn what it is to be selfless, as one who pours out, rather than comes to the table only to be fed and to slurp up ungraciously, all that is offered.

I have opportunity to practice love all day long and my tarnished efforts are a constant reminder of how far I have yet to go…

Love it patient- I am not.

Love is kind- I can be most unkind.

Love is not easily angered- I slip here all of the time.

It always protects, trusts, hopes, perseveres- I fail, I doubt, I quit.

I have mountains to learn still about real love. I have scores of work left to overcome the flesh and live in communion with the Spirit, the one who is Love. 

But daily I rise with the knowledge that this is a new day. Each sunrise, the marking of a fresh opportunity to learn it well, to live it out in the bold red that it is, the fire-hot love that embraces the crying child gently, rather than rebukes in harsh tones.

I can try again to be the Mom who says “yes” with a smile, and a laugh, rather than “no” with scowling lips and exasperated sighs.

This practice of love is hard fought here, but the efforts worth the energy.  The rewards immeasurable, watching souls fill up and bubble with joy, with the knowing that they are loved, that I am loved, despite my flaws and failings.

We are loved.

And so we know and rely on the love God has for us.
God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them. 1 John 4:16 

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  1. Ro elliott

    Amen…yes with a smile…not not with a scowl…I try not to envy all the young mom’s who get all this at such a young age…but I know God does cover all our sins and failures…my kids can attest to that…
    Blessings as you continue to grow into such a wonderful momma…

    1. alwaysalleluia

      Thank you for the encuragement, Ro. I always need it, and always appreciate ot from those who have traveled this bumpy path ahead of me. God’s blessing be yours today.

  2. Thank you, Krissie.  I am so encouraged, so filled with hope, in your beautiful offering here.  Yes, each day is sparkling new, His love for us is always enough, no matter what.  Your children are so precious, and your heart photo is stunning.  Thank you.

    1. alwaysalleluia

      Jennifer, you are such a sweet friend. So thankful for how you encourage me, and others through your passion for the Lord, and your heart for community. You bless me, sister.


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