Because I Still Want Your Approval

February 27, 2014

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I like to think I’m beyond it, this ugly need to have your approval. I’ve written about it. I’ve been real about it, and sometimes I believe for a few days that I’ve finally beaten it. The truth is, I haven’t–not yet. Words of affirmation is my love language, so is gifts, but affirmation is my main one. And I hate it. Needing to hear these words sometimes feeds my unhealthy desire to matter to everyone. All of the affirmation I need can be found in scripture, but sometimes, (too often) that’s not enough for my heart. Your approval
When Jennifer Lee told me about her book, Love Idol: Letting Go of Your Need for Approval-and Seeing Yourself through God’s Eyes, I knew my heart was going to be challenged again. I’m quick to forget that the only approval I need is Christ’s and I already have it because I am His. For all of the ways I disqualify myself, He covers with His blood and chooses me.



He is my friend–I’m in His inner ring. 

I’ve said before that the only the ONE thing I want my children to leave home knowing, is that they are chosen by God, for His glory. That they are loved, and preapproved of because of His mercy and grace. That’s it. If they can hit the wide-world with that truth ingrained in their hearts then they will be ahead of so many who struggle their whole lives to feel worth.


It’s so easy for me to believe my worth and value is in what I do, how much I weigh, how I look or how many friends I have. It’s ridiculous, I know, but the struggle is real. God continues to push me to find my worth IN HIM. He’s progressively bringing me low, making me less, so He can be more.  This is all I want. And it’s so good.




This Lent, we’re ousting the idols from our hearts. We’re saying no to the things that fight for first place in our lives–the things that don’t belong, the things that shift our focus off of God.

We are His. Our approval exists IN HIM.  This is not a feel good statement–this is fact.


How about you? What stands between you and God?

You’re loved friend. Loved, treasured, cherished–chosen, just as you are.

Right now. In the mess. In the broken. Right this minute–and every minute after.


The book that inspired this movement releases April 1st. You can pre-order it now.

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  • Karrilee Aggett

    I’m in too! I love this… (just remind me of that about halfway through, alright?) It’ll be worth it… it’s always worth it to give Him more of our hearts!

  • Barbie

    I must join in this movement. I still wrestling with acceptance, all…the…time!

  • DoveWhisperer

    My emotions are my idols, to be sure. My emotions tell me that they rule me, that others’ view is the most important, that I am good for nothing, that I will always be a slave to my negative emotions. Tonight is a particularly bad night for me. I’m struggling. But I needed to read this. I love Jennifer Dukes Lee to bits and love her blog…I was already going to read this, but now I’m going to make it my number 2 priority. I’ve got to get my number 1 – God – back in place.