Faith

When Dissatisfaction Comes Knocking

The beauty of the internet and blogging world is that I have been blessed to meet many encouraging and inspiring women out there, many of whom  share the love of Christ and words and all things in between. Beck Gambill is one such woman, who I have enjoyed reading and was sweet enough to accept my humble request for her to share her words with you on my site today. I pray you enjoy her words and wisdom as much as I have. Thank you, and God continue to bless you, Beck.

 

When the restless ache sets into your shoulders, who do you blame? When you want to pick a fight or whine like a baby do you ever twist and turn looking for a cause? Or am I the only one who has days like that? Days that just won’t lay themselves straight but bunch up into unmanageable knots.

Actually I would say I was born that way. Looking for a fight from day one. Like a cat that’s been rubbed the wrong way, I just was not satisfied. It’s taken me years to name that something that didn’t set right in my soul.

But finally I have. I’m not satisfied. And honestly I never will be, at least not here. I live with chronic homesickness. Oddly, I’m okay with it now, as okay as you can be living with an itch you can’t scratch. I’m learning to use it to my advantage.

Five months ago, due to job transition, my family moved in with dear friends. Their kids have left home and my family of four found space to tuck into, all in the same house. My kids love these friends and we’ve made life as normal as possible for them while Daddy looks for a job.

Yet my daughter, Maggie, has never accepted this home as her own. She’s three, what difference should it make where we live as long as she’s loved, she has her baby doll and dress up clothes, and is surrounded by family. But it does.

Maggie refuses to refer to the house we share as “home,” even months later. She calls it Aunt Terry’s house. And occasionally she’ll ask, “where’s our home, our red one (I decorated a lot with red!), I can’t find it.” Breaks my heart, but it’s true. It comes up often and she’s adamant, this is not her home.

The other day with the whole family together in the car, out of the blue Maggie starts singing a made up diddy, “My red house is gone. Gone, gone, gone. Oh, my red house is gone. It’s gone away, so sad.” No joke! I must say I didn’t expect this response from a three year old. I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry, I did both!

I’ve discovered over the years I’m a lot like Maggie. I’m looking for my home. I’m relieved now, when the old dissatisfaction creeps in, to have a name for it, and a solution.

My solution is an adjustment of expectations. Instead of looking to my husband to meet my emotional needs, an elusive writing career to validate, or food to fill me, I acknowledge that these longings speak of what’s to come. The ache of want points me home. Home holds the key, eternity in Jesus’ presence. The only place satisfaction is found.

Next time satisfaction eludes you, turn your eyes homeward and press in. Dissatisfaction is a powerful tool, stripping away our fascination with temporal and giving a taste for eternal.

Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory. Colossians 3:1-4

How about you, when the ache of this world sets in do you turn your face to Jesus? Are you longing for home?

{Beck Gambill writes on the journey homeward, sisters who encourage along the way, and embracing beauty all around. You can visit her at Beck Far From Home.}

0 thoughts on “When Dissatisfaction Comes Knocking

    1. Anonymous

      I appreciate YOU, Beck. Your post was shockingly timely for me as I have been struggling much lately with a deep restlessness and longing for ‘home’. I shouldn’t have been surprised when I re-read your post and was ministered to by your words. God always does that to me, and yet, I am often surprised by it. You blessed me mightily. Thank you, friend.

      Reply
  1. It’s so funny becasue my youngest always says “I want to go home” although, we are home and have lived here for 10 years. My daughter will also say “I want to go home” and again, this has always been our home. I know that feeling though, a place that feels unsettled, in my soul. When I have that feeling I take it as a sign that I need to move, not homes, but move from my place of fear, or anger or just boredom. Trusting to take just one step foward is what I am striving for. Thanks Beck for a beautiful post!

    Reply
    1. “One step forward”, I love it, each step draws us closer home. Kids are funny in their ability to voice what other’s are feeling. I guess we are each made with a compass that points us home. Thanks for stopping by and sharing your thoughts Kathy!

      Reply
    1. Thanks Barbara! Actually, a few days after I wrote this post, my husband was offered a job. Part of the compensation is a parsonage for us to live in that is just beautiful, we’re so thankful! Maggie is excited about her new home!

      Reply
  2. Anonymous

    Hi Beck,

    So glad to read from your reply that God has provided a job for your husband.  I could relate to how you took your dissatisfaction and pointed it homeward to God. Wonderful post!
    Psalm 63:1 in The Message translation by Eugene Peterson expresses it well:

    “God-you’re my God!  I can’t get enough of you!  I’ve worked up such hunger and thirst for God, traveling across dry and weary deserts.” 

    So true.  My desert times have increased my desire for God.
    Blessings to you and your family!  And thanks to Kris for hosting Beck!

    Reply

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