When You Dream That Your Dying

Posted by on February 20, 2012 in Giving Thanks, Thanksgiving, Trust | 13 comments

And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.Hebrews 11:6

I woke the other morning just as the wings clipped a pole and sheered clean off of the plane I rode on.

An unknown, yet familiar voice from overhead speakers assures me not to worry, it will be fine. My hands clenched the arm rests and I felt the blood drain from my face.

How will it be fine, I think, we are free-falling.

And that was it. I woke up. 

I don’t know anyone who has ever actually died in their dreams. I have come close a few times, this recent plane-crash dream being one of them-

I dream a lot. God speaks to me in dreams visions, most of the time in sleep, though occasionally, when I am awake. And I do love a good discussion about dreams and their symbolism. There were plenty of dreamers in the bible, so I feel I am in good company. And me being me, I had to analyze this dream a bit too, asking God always, if there is anything I should glean from it, or was it just the result of an overactive psyche- an entirely possible explanation. 

I sit and I wait. I hear there words faith, and trust. Words I have been using frequently these days, as if they might vanish forever.

What is faith other than blind trust in something we cannot see?

Trust, being my one word for this year, has already  whomped me good over the head a few times, as the lessons come steady- day after day, minute after minute, hour after hour-

Our faith makes us not unlike passengers on a plane, gypsies on a journey into foreign lands. We live daily, somewhat at the mercy of things outside of our control. We are not the pilot. We exist merely as passengers. We simply follow the One who is greater, the One who leads us blindly, yet willingly, if we are faithful, into the vast unknown.

We live the free-fall of life, not knowing where or when we will land, but trusting that it is good, becauseHe is good.

I don’t know what happens when my plane hits the ground.  But His voice says “don’t worry, it will be fine”.

What can I do but trust? Why would I worry at that point-what good would come of it?

do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.Philippians 4:6-7

I know that a plane needs wings to fly, just as I know that I cannot live without faith.

“Faith is what makes life barable, with all it’s tradgedies and ambiguities and sudden startling joys.” Madeline L’Engle

For now I take from this dream the idea that no matter what, in the scariest of potential circumstances, I need only to trust. Minutes and days are not to be frittered away, choking on the fears and worries that steal joy.
Life is meant to be lived with arms raised, hands open, wings of faith spread wide with anticipation for whatever may come. 

I keep counting my gifts, because in doing so, my focus shifts from the wings that have been sheered off, to the joy of knowing, the relief of trusting, that whatever happens, His outstretched arms will always catch me.

1011. The outrageous community of women I have found who pray for me daily. I cannot believe how blessed I am.
1012.  Fighting through the desire to quit.
1013.  Children fighting with each other and then offering apologies and forgiveness without my prompting.
1014.  The hard job of mothering. It never ends, there are no scheduled breaks, and the clean-up of various bodily fluids is a constant.
1015.  Family
1016. This friend.
1017. And this One
1018.  And these women.
1019. Boys who love to do math (Proof God does have a sense of humor, for a woman who lives in fear of numbers)
1020. Little girls singing princess songs and dancing wild to Mat Kearny’s “Hey Mama” (I dare you to listen to that song and not dance!)

Joining the community of friends and Ann in giving thanks for all things. Won’t you join in the praise?

Want to keep up with me? Subscribe to Always Alleluia by Email to get my posts delivered right to your inbox. You can also find me on Facebook and twitter
  • Tara_pohlkottepress

    “fighting the desire to quit” yes!! keep fighting, I will too :)

    • alwaysalleluia

      indeed, bless you Tara, may He give us both the strength we need to endure!

  • http://www.toshowthemjesus.com/ Christina

    So many I can relate to…1014 and 1019 especially. And trust…such a challenge for this heart. Yet Jesus told the disciples countless times that they had “little faith.” I find it comforting that he didn’t knock them over the head each time their faith wavered:) Great post!

    • alwaysalleluia

      I am also comforted by the patience of Christ in my weakest and most faithless moments. I long to have a bigger faith, that I might learn what it is to stand firm and rooted in His unfailing truth. Praying for you ad we learn daily to trust and not waicer!  He is faithful to hold us steady. ;)

  • http://myfreshlybrewedlife.com/ Barbie

    I am not much of  a dreamer.  Someone once told me that I do dream, but I never remember them. They also told me it’s because I stay up too late and never enter REM sleep!  But, God does show me pictures and sometimes visions.  So thankful He speaks to me in these ways.  I can especially relate to # 1012 this past week.  Had to walk through a hard place.  So thankful for His grace and strength to allow me to continue.

    • alwaysalleluia

      Thankful with you, Barbie. I love and treasure the visions He gives. I miss them in the quiet seasons of my walk with Him, but when they come, I am always so thankful for His chosen method of communicating with me. I hate to hear that you miss so much sleep!  praying rest for you and peaceful sleep that comes night after night! 

  • Ro elliott

    for me…trust is linked to knowing HIs love…the more I really know how much He loves me…the more trust is built…one block at a time…
    oh yes… hard mothering…don’t quit…keep going…you are doing a great job…
    Blessings~

    • alwaysalleluia

      Yes!  It comes down to truly knowing we are loved!  I know this! Some days it is easier for me to accpet than others. And yes, I will not quit. mothering these little people brings immeasurable joy to my life, even on thehardest of days, I fully recognize the blessing that they are. God has given me much! Bless you, sweet Ro! ;)

  • http://twitter.com/lifesurrendered Michele-Lyn Ault

    I too, have made the shift and have begun focusing on counting His love gifts… 

    I love this what you wrote… not because I am very good at it myself… but a wonderful reminder for me … “We live the free-fall of life, not knowing where or when we will land, but trusting that it is good, becauseHe is good.”

    Blessings to you… 

    • alwaysalleluia

      Thank you, Michele-Lyn. Your words are grace to me, an encouragement I needed to hear. Thankful for you, in this community of grace-chasers. Praying God gives you strength for this day, and joy that surpases understanding as you seek Him first in all things. 

  • http://beckfarfromhome.blogspot.com/ Beck Gambill

    I used to have really vivid dreams, and I’ve had several that had very specific spiritual messages. Now I think I’m so tired I don’t remember my dreams well! That’s a timely truth though, God is so faithful and we are so in need of his stability. Sometimes I want to demand to be let off of the plane! But I know God has an amazing journey planned! Thanks for sharing that dream with us.

    • alwaysalleluia

      Beck, I hear and hold your words tight. He is so faithful!  And yes, sometimes I am certain I am on the wrong plane and that fiery flames await me at the drop, but then I always imagine His unsizable hands holding my plane, as a child holds a toy, and He is in control, and I have nothing to worry about. ;) 

  • http://youaremygirls.com Jennifer Camp

    Wow.  Thank you for your words, Krissie!   “Life is meant to be lived with arms raised, hands open, wings of faith spread wide with anticipation for whatever may come. ”